MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY !!!

Cat's should be outlawed.

There ought to be a bounty on these damned pests.

Regarding breeding & feeding ... Cats are nothing but oversized cockroaches.

Wipe the lot out.


"Willie Eckerslyke" wrote in message
...
ATTN, all keen gardeners !

Cats are now universally recognised as the gardener's public enemy No.1.

I & my wife love our garden & try to keep it in good condition ....
growing
flowers/vegetables .... a nice lawn .... & enjoying BBQ's, throughout
summer.

The only thing that spoils our *private* walled garden are the local
vermin,
aka CATS !

Up until a couple of days ago, we were having to dig up & bin (OUR
dustbin)
fresh cat shit EVERY morning, from our garden ...... & we have NO pets.

Cat owners will speak in defence of their vermin ... but MUST realise what
VERY selfish people they are.

The garden is OURS ! The cat owner's shitting machine is theirs ! They
make ZERO attempts to control their straying vermin. Admittedly, I
thank
the VERY rare cat owner that takes the trouble to keep a litter-tray on
their own premises. THANK YOU !

Let me explain. Dear cat owner, would it be OK if I came into your garden
&
had a shit in it EVERYDAY ? How would you feel about having to clean it
up
, EVERYDAY ?

The vast majority of cat owners are LAZY , selfish people. Cat owners do
not have to take their pets for walks ..... unlike dog owners.

Cats ALWAYS shit outside of their owners premises.

Cats are smart ... but also VERY demonic & selfish. How many other
animals
"kill for fun" ? ( some smart b*stards might say "humans" .... but, tough
titty, reader .... I'm Anti-Hunting"). I wish I had a quid for every
time
I've seen a cat kill a little bird & then play with it's mutilated body
...... just for playsake ..... not even bothering to eat the corpse.

Cats will go to ANYONE that offers them food. ZERO loyalty, unlike dogs.
Women & homosexuals love cats. "Furry, lovely, cute creatures".
But, cat owner, watch your cute, furry little pet walk up to & press
it's body (whilst turning on the EXTRA loud purring !) to your worst enemy
of a neighbour, simply because they held out an outstretched hand (as in
offering food) & then made the right "pss pss" noise. Cats are traitors,
unlike dogs.

To get to the point, there IS a way of keeping them out of your beloved
garden.

Cover all access walls with non-drying, black, anti-vandal paint. (
"TORA"
is a good, UK brand) Coat the tops of the walls to around a quarter of an
inch deep. It's not very expensive & most paint retailers stock it.
Cats
are very vain creatures & this stuff is a perfect deterrent to the little
monstors. It's like crude oil on their paws ...... they WON'T come back.
It also, hopefully, gives their selfish owners something to think about
...... as the oil based substance is brought back into THEIR homes ( &
hopefully onto their carpets !).

Cocoa mulch is a good cat poisoner. Downside ..... a little expensive
(large amounts) & not very attractive in the garden.

Most important to remember. The cat, like a burglar, is an unwanted
intruder. Therefore ..... legally ..... anything that you mix with
cat-food & leave on a plate ( on YOUR cat-shit-affected area ) is up to
you.

Warfarin & finely grated, broken glass are good ideas.

Happy vermin eradicating !

"Eugene Kent" wrote in message
...
Must be an extremely small garden that one small cat can thrash the whole
garden. What a really big disaster if a stupid extra large dog decided to
give it a visit.


It's a very large & apparently well-aged cat. I've seen it , but have not
(YET !) been quick enough to kill it.

Our garden is huge.

2 questions arrise, here.

What's thrash ?

Dogs cannot get into our garden, why should I give a flying f*ck about them
?

The feline vermin shits in our garden, every day.

You have still not answered MY question ...... "How about I come & shit in
your garden, EVERYDAY ?"

C'mon ....... be honest, pussy boy.

"Eugene Kent" wrote in message
...
Must be an extremely small garden that one small cat can thrash the whole
garden. What a really big disaster if a stupid extra large dog decided to
give it a visit.


It's a very large & apparently well-aged cat. I've seen it , but have not
(YET !) been quick enough to kill it.

Our garden is huge.

2 questions arrise, here.

What's thrash ?

Dogs cannot get into our garden, why should I give a flying f*ck about them
?

The feline vermin shits in our garden, every day.

You have still not answered MY question ...... "How about I come & shit in
your garden, EVERYDAY ?"

C'mon ....... be honest, pussy boy.

"Eugene Kent" wrote in message
...
Must be an extremely small garden that one small cat can thrash the whole
garden. What a really big disaster if a stupid extra large dog decided to
give it a visit.


It's a very large & apparently well-aged cat. I've seen it , but have not
(YET !) been quick enough to kill it.

Our garden is huge.

2 questions arrise, here.

What's thrash ?

Dogs cannot get into our garden, why should I give a flying f*ck about them
?

The feline vermin shits in our garden, every day.

You have still not answered MY question ...... "How about I come & shit in
your garden, EVERYDAY ?"

C'mon ....... be honest, pussy boy.

thrash means to tear up or destroy.
Your neighbor's dogs must really be stupid.

"Mick C. Metosis" wrote in message
...

"Eugene Kent" wrote in message
...
Must be an extremely small garden that one small cat can thrash the
whole
garden. What a really big disaster if a stupid extra large dog decided
to
give it a visit.


It's a very large & apparently well-aged cat. I've seen it , but have
not
(YET !) been quick enough to kill it.

Our garden is huge.

2 questions arrise, here.

What's thrash ?

Dogs cannot get into our garden, why should I give a flying f*ck about
them
?

The feline vermin shits in our garden, every day.

You have still not answered MY question ...... "How about I come & shit in
your garden, EVERYDAY ?"

C'mon ....... be honest, pussy boy.

"Mick C. Metosis" wrote in message
...

You have still not answered MY question ...... "How about I come & shit in
your garden, EVERYDAY ?"

Some would say, "Cool! Free fertilizer!" Some would reach for their shotgun.
I would reach for the phone and call the cops. I would really like to be in
the courthouse when you and your attorney make an appearance to defend
yourself against the charge of shatting in someone's garden.